Ufatio crnac zlatnu ribicu i ona mu ispadne. I on ode u zlataru.
Peco crnac i upeca zlatnu ribicu, a ona mu:
- "Pusti me ispunicu ti zelju."
- "Zelim da budem bijel."
...i ona ga zaposli u pekaru.
Idem zenom u dzepu mi cigla.ona jadna misli kita mi se digla...
na tebe cu prestati da mislim kad tisina progovori,kad se spavalica obraduje zori kad smijeh izraste iz pakla i hada se smijeh zacuje iz pakla...
hm
bili ivica i marica....i oni rese da se pojebu i sad marica uze i pusi kurac ivici pa predjose oni na stvar.pojebase se oni onako znojavi kaze ivica marici aj te napunim jos malo pa idi u susednu sobu da te pojebe sad malo tata dosta sam ja a ja odo malo mamu da punim pa cu i onda malo tatu
Kupio svceučilišni profesor zemljište i vidio to cigo, pa kupi i on odmah pored njega.
Poceo profesor zidati kucu, a cigo radi sve isto kao i on.
Nakon nekog vremena sazidali njih dvojica kuce i izasli van pa se dive.
Kaze profesor: Jel sused sta mislis koliko bi mi mogli dobiti za nase kuce?
Veli cigo: Slusj sused ti bi mogao dobiti jedno 100.000 eura, a ja bi mogao dobiti jedno 300.000 eura.
Kaze profesor: Kako sad ja samo 100.000, a ti 300.000
Kaže mu cigo: A slusaj sused, ja za susjeda imam sveucilisnog profesora, a ti cigana.
Koja je razlika izmedju 6 zena i 2 pegle?
- 4
...
Koliko je potrebno crnkinji da se posere?
- 9. mjeseci
1. I've smoked fatter joints than that.
2. Ahh, it's cute.
3. Who circumcised you?
4. Why don't we just cuddle?
5. You know they have surgery to fix that.
6. It's more fun to look at.
7. Make it dance.
8. You know, there's a tower in Italy like that.
9. Can I paint a smiley face on that?
10. It looks like a night crawler.
11. Wow, and your feet are so big.
12. My last boyfriend was 4'' bigger.
13. It's ok, we'll work around it.
14. Is this a mild or a spicy Slim Jim?
15. Eww, there's an inch worm on your thigh.
16. Will it squeak if I squeeze it?
17. Oh no, a flash headache.
18. (giggle and point)
19. Can I be honest with you?
20. My 8-year-old brother has one like that.
21. Let me go get my tweezers.
22. How sweet, you brought incense.
23. This explains your car.
24. You must be a growing boy.
25. Maybe if we water it, it'll grow.
26. Thanks, I needed a toothpick.
27. Are you one of those pygmies?
28. Have you ever thought of working in a sideshow?
29. Every heard of clearasil?
30. All right, a treasure hunt!
31. I didn't know they came that small.
32. Why is God punishing you?
33. At least this won't take long.
34. I never saw one like that before.
35. What do you call this?
36. But it still works, right?
37. Damn, I hate baby-sitting.
38. It looks so unused.
39. Do you take steroids?
40. I hear excessive masturbation shrinks it.
41. Maybe it looks better in natural light.
42. Why don't we skip right to the cigarettes?
43. Oh, I didn't know you were in an accident.
44. Did you date Lorena Bobbitt?
45. Aww, it's hiding.
46. Are you cold?
47. If you get me real drunk first.
48. Is that an optical illusion?
49. What is that?
50. I'll go get the ketchup for your french fry.
51. Were you neutered?
52. It's a good thing you have so many other talents.
53. Does it come with an air pump?
54. So this is why you're supposed to judge people on personality.
55. Where are the puppet strings?
56. Your big gun is more like a BB gun.
57. Look, it fits my Barbie clothes.
58. Never mind, why bother.
59. Is that a second belly button?
60. Where's the rest of it?

TRCI MALI MOMAK ZA COVJEKOM I VICE:CIKO,CIKO KOLIKO JE SATI?
COVJEK SE OKRENE I KAZE:MA STA JA ZNAM PITAJ ZAGORA...!!!
"... i tako ti ja, bolan Haso, sjednem u avion i pravac Frankfurt, kad za pola sata pojavi se neka raja, zauzmu avion i kazu da su otmicari.A mene bas zaboli, ono, nije moj avion, briga me, hladan ko Klint Istvud. Bio sam miran sve dok nisu krenuli da siluju jednu zensku. Tu je meni puk'o film.
Digo se ja i dreknem: Pustite je!!!
I pustili je na miru, ali postavili meni ultimatum: Il' skaces il' te svi guzimo!"
Haso se sav uzivio u pricu.
"... I, jesi skako???"
"Jesam malo u pocetku... dok mi se guzica nije razradila"
Ide plavuša ulicom i sretne neku ženu, pa joj kaže:

Tanja, jesi li to ti? Bože, kako si se samo promijenila od srednje škole!-

Izvinite, ali ja se uopće ne zovem Tanja!- odgovara žena začuđeno.

A plavuša će na to:

Pa to je sjajno! Znači promijenila si čak i ime!

11
Zašto plavuša nije mogla da napise broj jedanest?

Nije znala koja jedinica ide prva.
Koju prvu stvar plavuša radi ujutro?

Ide kući.
...
Kako skinuti jednu jednoruku plavušu s drveta?

Mahni joj.
Voze dva kostura bicikl i jedan kaze drugom: - Aj stanemo malo, bole me misici!
IDU DVE PUSHKE ULICOM I PUCAJU OD SMEHA.
Na granicnom prelazu carinik rutinski pita putnika:
- Viski, konjak, rakija, cigarete?
- Ne, hvala, ali može jedna malo gorca kafica!
Žali se Pinokio tati da ga cure ne vole zbog kvadratne k*te.
Tata: "Ošmirglaj ga!".
Drugi dan pita tata kako je, a Pinokio će: "Pusti cure, smirgl je zakon!"
Vraćali se dva sundjera sa mora. Jednog zgazi auto a ovaj drugi se ocijedi od smijeha